Words’ End

Around midnight tonight, I drove to a local Barnes & Noble for the release of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. When else was I going to be around Southern California, which most of me detests, surrounded by people to whom I mostly cannot relate, participating in a real American fan frenzy? This had to be witnessed.

I’d found myself in this same B&N the other week, when I came in to get Learning Perl. (Tonight, for the record, I saw the second edition of this book for something like $8, whereas 3rd ed. cost about $35. Rar.) While there, for the fun of it, I put my name in for pre-order of the Harry Potter book. I like the series so far, the hype’s a bit much, but it is good children’s lit. It’s worth it. I found it impossible to put down #4, and swallowed that tome whole in record time. It’s on par with Milne and Baum and Lindgren. (How many Americans know Astrid Lindgren’s work, anyway? Besides Pippi Longstocking? Hell, how many Americans have read Pippi? What about Karlson Who Lives On The Roof? The Nils series?)

I had planned to see what the line was like and leave if it was a madhouse; instead, the madhouse sucked me in with its contagious energy and squealing children. Hyped up toddlers-thru-adults counted down to midnight as if it were New Year’s, and applauded and blew party horns when the registers opened! It was cute! Tiny kids in huuuge round black plastic glasses; black, white and purple balloons everywhere; appropriate soundtrack music playing over the intercom; cheery, excited staff; a line of, I don’t know, 300? 400? that wound all through the store; B&N employee, or maybe just a guy, wandering through the queue asking trivia questions and awarding promotional trading cards…

It wasn’t about the money spent. It was the fandom and the laughing chattering crowds and the… herdiness of it all that got me to stay. Hey, at least we weren’t silently “uniting” to “stand behind” Bush and his cronies in questionable military action. We were there because we loved the story and wanted more. If only all expressions of the herd mentality are as innocuous as this one…

Of course, all the casual glancing at bookshelves all through the store, while in line, got me into serious trouble. Four books for the price of… well, four, but two of them discounted, so I get some credit, right? A Rand McNally road atlas, the “old” one from 2002 discounted to a third of its price; hooray, now I have my maps for the way back to Providence at the end of the summer. The gorgeous little Cook’s Encyclopedia of Japanese Cooking, a true encyclopedia with beautifully reproduced pottery art examples, well-illustrated cooking techniques and clear recipe directions. Finally, Erica Fischer’s Aimée & Jaguar, a book I’ve been meaning to read for ages. From the back of the book:

Unique, moving and true—this radiant love story is set against the horrific backdrop of World War II Nazi Germany. When Lilly “Aimée” Wust, a gentile mother of four and wife of a Nazi officer, met Felice “Jaguar” Schragenheim, a Jew living underground in Berlin, neither could have guessed that their brief initial encounter would develop into a blazing, devoted love. As the Nazi strangle-hold closed in on them, Lilly and Felice found themselves fighting insurmountable odds to stay together. Extraordinarily passionate and heartrending, this is a rare and personal look at the love and strength of two women whose commitment to each other defied the brutality of their time.

Our present is not brutal in that same horrible sense, but women and men who love each other still cannot openly express their love in so many parts of the world, on so many streets, in so many apartment buildings, for fear of being mocked, maimed, killed. It breaks my heart.

Who was it that said about her lovers’ gender(s), “I’m a people person”? It wasn’t Stein, was it? For being one of my personal inspirations, this quote is certainly anonymous in my brain… or was it Dietrich? Anyway, I want to be her when I grow up, as regards that delicate level of enough publicity to make noise, but little enough of it to discreetly retain class and dignity.

Here’s a little contribution toward that goal: love of varying degrees, and sex, are gorgeous and inspiring when done right. “Right” is any way which does not harm others or rise out of coercion or selfishness. I’ll be damned if I ever hide in shame for making myself and others happy and productive members of our world in whichever way we choose.